Doctor, Doctor

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming: "Woo-hoo, what a ride!"  (Anon)

I AGREE with the above so I when it comes to my health I'm taking the advice of a Chinese internet doctor (let the word "internet" tip you off about the validity of this advice…but oh how I wish it was true)!

On exercise:  Your heart only good for so many beats, and that is it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster.  Want to live longer?  Take nap.

On alcohol:  There is no need to reduce alcohol consumption. Wine made from fruit.  Brandy is distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain.  Bottom up!

On fried food:  Food are fried these day in vegetable oil.  In fact, they permeated by it.  How could getting more vegetable be bad for you?!?

On sit-ups: When you exercise muscle, it get bigger.  You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.

On chocolate:  Are you crazy?!?  HEL-LO-O!!  Cocoa bean!  Another vegetable!  It best feel-good food around!

On swimming:  If swimming good for your figure, explain whale to me..

Getting in shape: Hey!  'Round' is shape!

That sounds like a diet and exercise regime I can cope with!

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